First online dating messages can be awkward, but finding some common ground can ease that tension and open the door for a great conversation to happen. Take the time to look through the person’s music interests, what books they like to read, what they went to school for, what they do for work, and any other information they chose to display. 2 days ago GamesRadar+ takes you closer to the games, movies and TV you love. Online Dating First Message #2: Last Thing. It’s deceivingly simple to ask the last thing your match did as your online dating first message, but it’s a super effective strategy. This is the kind of question a friend would ask, so you are starting things off intimately without coming off as creepy. Yes, dating is all about getting to know each other, sharing, and learning, but there is plenty of time for that down the road. That time is not in your first message. You may have so much in common with each other that you just have to tell him all about it. Example Online Dating First Emails. Giving advice on writing a better first message in online dating is good, but I think examples make it better. Let’s look at a few real profiles, although I am shortening them, that I’m pulling from a popular dating site. I’ll write a first email that I would send if I were interested in meeting the woman.

A first impression is everything. But when that first impression is reduced to a single line it becomes magnified. If meeting someone in person, you have time to redeem yourself or shape your image. Online dating doesn’t grant users such opportunities. For the intrepid online dater, this one line is your only chance to make an impact. Below you’ll find 50 online dating first message examples for guys that have been proven to work. But before you scan the list, copy, and paste, here are some things to keep in mind.

Get Acquainted With Her Profile

The best types of messages are personalized. A generic, “Hey, what’s your favorite movie?” is nothing compared to a more tailor-made message. To make a message personal, read through her entire profile to get a sense of her likes and dislikes. Don’t ignore the fact that she mentioned “Forget meditating to relax, I do PEMDAS instead.” Address her profile by responding to something she wrote.

Edit/Revise

It’s all about creating awesome first impressions. So when you slovenly write “your” when you should’ve written, “you’re,” you come off as a bit juvenile. A quick read through of your message before you send it ensures that any grammatical or spelling errors will be remedied.

Before pressing send, revise your message. The best writers in the world spend hours throwing away entire pages before they’re written something of worth. Take a note from the greats and think of the first message you write as a rough draft. Compose yourself before sending it off and ask if you can write an even better online dating first message. Chances are you can.

Be Different

She’s already getting inundated with vapid “H factor” words like: hi, hey, hello, hola, etc. If you don’t believe me, ask to see a female friend’s Tinder account and check for yourself. An insipid first message isn’t worth responding to unless your profile makes you out to be a superhero. Being different will make you stand out. When the recipient can tell that you’ve taken the time to write something unique, she’ll feel special. That’s never a bad thing.

Online Dating First Message Examples for Guys

When She Has No Written Bio

This is a tough one. How are you expected to create a personalized message when the written portion of her profile is blank? Hopefully you can glean enough about her from her photos to write her a witty first message. But if she’s only posted bathroom selfies, there’s little chance of that. There are two things you can do in this situation. One is to ditch her. Is the prolific bathroom selfie taker really the type of girl you want to be chasing? Option two is that you can ask her a probing question that forces her to tell you something about herself. Here are a few online dating first messages that will help you out.

Online Dating First Message Examples #1: “Hey Chelsea, tell me something cool about yourself.”

Whenever possible, use her name. Dale Carnegie, author of one of the best selling books of all time, How to Win Friends & Influence People, says that “a person’s name is, to that person, the sweetest and most important sound in any language.” Writing her name gives the message a personal touch.

Follow it up by soliciting information about her. Asking her to tell you something cool about herself is to ask her to prove her worth. It also works because now you’ll get to know something unique about this stranger. When possible, skip the default getting-to-know-you questions and opt for something a bit more edgy.

Line 2: “So tell me Rebecca. What was the last song you belted?”

This is a variation of the oft-asked question of, “What’s your favorite band?” This question more easily leads to an in-depth conversation. More so than learning about her musical interests, this question seeks to find out how that specific song was selected, where it was sung, and why. There’s a story connected to the question. It’s fun for the recipient because she’s never received a first message like this one before. The act of recalling the song and basking in the enjoyment of singing it is a fun mental exercise.

Line 3: “Let’s skip the customary ice breakers. Instead, tell me something weird about you.”

Again we see the banal opener being sidestepped for a stimulating question. She’s likely to tell you something odd about herself because you’re currently nothing more than a stranger. To her, this conversation just became a quirky little game.

Line 4: “Your profile says so much about you, but I can’t help but think that I’m missing something. Before we go any further, is there anything else I should know about you?”

This request for information will likely lead to her sharing the information that she was too lazy to write in her profile. The message works because it’s flirty on a subtle level. Her profile says absolutely nothing about her. You’re playfully poking fun at how god-awful her profile is. You will surely elicit an interesting response with such a question.

Line 5: “So tell me Mariela. How can I make you fall in love with me?”

Yup, it’s bold, but that’s why it’ll work. The message isn’t salacious or irreverent. It’s innocent enough to be romantic. It’ll make her comb through her past experiences to figure out what it takes for her to fall in love with a guy. If she answers, she’ll be giving you the key to her heart. Now all you have to do is walk through the labyrinth to get to the door.

Line 6: “Tell me a secret” or “Tell me something you don’t want your Mom to know about you.”

There’s no better way to accelerate a bond than through the sharing of secrets. Ask her to tell you something her mother doesn’t even know about her.

Line 7: “Did you know Sarah Palin calls her husband Todd, the “First Dude”?

Pretty much any fun fact about Sarah Palin is gold. This one just happens to be one of the funnier ones. When in doubt, send her a random, yet funny fact.


Line 8: “What does your perfect day look like? Also… if it involves anything to do with rock climbing can I come with?”

The first question alone is a bit generic. Other dudes have probably messaged her that exact line. But by revealing what you like to do she learns a little bit about you, thus making you more human in her eyes and thus more worthy of a response.

Line 9: “So Jessica, tell me. What do you do for fun when you’re not flirting with strangers you met on Tinder?”

Two things are happening here. You’re showing a genuine interest in getting to know her while (hopefully) making her laugh. It’s the perfect combination of edgy and authenticity.

Line 10: Is it just me or is Meryl Streep by far the most overrated actor?

Right though? Everyone has seen a Meryl Streep movie and thus it’ll be more or less easy for her to comment. Personally, I’d agree. She’s good, but she’s not Daniel Day Lewis.

When Her Bio Includes Info About Her Favorite Show/Series

Introduction message on dating site

Online Dating First Message Examples for Guys #11: “Love is like starting a sentence that goes nowhere and just hopes to find meaning along the way.”

Any devout follower of The Office will recognize this variation of a Michael Scott quote. Sure it’s dorky, but if you send this, you’ll just have combined her two most favorite things. Michael Scott and falling in love.

Line 12: The Office Trivia: Who Said It? “Dwight you ignorant slut!”

Generally I’d say stay away from including the word slut in an online dating first message, but when it’s a The Office quote, an exception can be made. The beauty of trivia is that it works for any show. Just pick whichever show she’s interested in and make your own trivia question.

Line 13: “Did you know Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams didn’t get along at first? I never would have guessed it.”

Sure it’s cliché, but you’re bound to run across a woman who lauds The Notebook in her profile. Don’t shy away from broaching it. Always steer the conversation towards things she likes.

Line 14: “I don’t know how I’ve made it this far without being exposed to any Game Of Thrones spoilers. Almost there!”

Spoilers are the bane of any serial series watcher. Bond over your shared ability to elude spoilers and love for one of the greatest dramas of all time. To the wall!

Line 15: I don’t know if this is going to work out Vanessa. Roma was hands down the most overrated movie of 2018. I tried to like it, I even watched it twice, but I just couldn’t.”

There’s nothing wrong with being a bit edgy. Most men that strike up a chat online are at fault for being too agreeable. Playfully and respectfully show her that you disagree with what she’s said about her favorite movie. It’ll quickly lead to a stimulating conversation.

When She Talks About Pizza

Online Dating First Message Examples #16: “Have you tried the La Regina pizza at Tony’s down in North Beach? It won the gold cup over in Italy.”

It doesn’t mater if she isn’t in San Francisco. Every foodie loves to talk about their favorite spots to eat. If she’s a pizza eater, ask her if she’s tried pizza at a particularly happening or obscure place.

Line 17: “Did you know that pizza as we know it originated in Naples in the 1600s? I learned that when an Italian guy yelled at me for saying that Little Caesar’s isn’t absolute garbage.

Facts are great and all but you don’t want to come off as a know-it-all. A little backstory as to why you know a certain fact creates a more well-rounded online dating first message.


When She Talks About Ice Cream

Line 18: “I hear your favorite ice cream tells a lot about you. Judging from your interest in Phish Food I’m going to guess that you prefer an all night jam band over a rave.”

Make assumptions. Even if they’re wrong she’ll feel obligated to correct you. Just make sure those assumptions are playful.

Line 19: “Have you tried that new place over on ‘x’ avenue? I hear its Mellow Yellow will split your tongue in half… I assume that’s a good thing.”

Get foodie with her. If she’s an epicurean, feed into her love of fine foods. Broaching a solid place to grab a scoop of ice cream is a nice segue into asking her out.

When She Talks About Brunch In Her Profile

Online Dating First Message Examples #20: “The next time you want to feel fancy while eating brunch just know that it originated in England in the 19th century.”

Make her life feel a little bit more spectacular with an interesting fact or two. As long as you’re not coming off as arrogant, you’ve probably constructed a message worth sending.

When She Talks About Scuba Diving

Line 21: “Your profile makes me so jealous. Can you teach me to be as cool as your?” (I’m referring to your badass scuba diving skills btw)

Flattery should only be used if it’s warranted. That being said, when scuba diving is in the picture, it’s definitely merited.

Line 22: “I’m not gonna lie, when I was a kid and people asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, I said scuba diver. Instead I chose to be (only insert your profession here if it’s somehow humorous in contrast to what you wanted to become).

Line 23: Let me see if I can stump you. Which are older: great white sharks or dinosaurs?”

It’s trivia time! Put your drinks to the side and get that buzzer hand ready. It’s never a bad time for a little spontaneous trivia.

Line 24: “Did you know mermaids smoke seaweed?”

I’ll be the first to say that this line won’t work on every woman. Only use it if she says that she’s into lame jokes or seems like the type of person that is into a lazy laugh.

Line 25: “I was kind of bummed to hear that there are only 70ish shark attacks every year. I still think you’re super brave.”

Call her valiant, make her feel like a knight, and she’ll surely respond positively to your message in due time.

Line 26: “Tell me something cool about scuba diving.”

When in doubt, remember to talk about a topic that she’s into. If you ask her about her passion she’ll start talking. This is the goal of a first message.

When Her Bio Includes Pictures Of Her Skiing/Snowboarding

Online Dating First Message Examples for Guys #27: “Be honest… do you beef with snowboarders?”

You’re right, it’s kind of dumb. But it’s also cute. Talking about her passion is never a bad call.

Line 28: “Global warming’s a bummer. It leads to war, the washing away of islands, and makes our president sound like an idiot. But for all the bad it’ll do I’m most worried about not being able to ski on fresh power.”

Such an online dating first message only really works if you two share the same passion. Should this be the case, harp on that until you’ve got a first date. When doing so never be afraid to show a little bit of wit.

Line 29: “Did you hit up any good mountains this past season?”

Simple and straightforward. The message shows that you read her profile and most likely share a hobby. Initial messages don’t need to be intricate. 70% of guys don’t even write initial messages that contain more than two words.


Line 30: “My biggest fear is getting crushed by an avalanche and stuck under the snow. I felt the need to share that with you.”

Addressing biggest fears right off the bat, that’s cool. It’s even better when that fear pertains to one of her hobbies.

When She Shows Off Her Pooch

Online Dating First Message Examples #31: “How long did it take to house train your pooch? I think my Lolita’s stench seemed into the wood floor.”

Bond over the struggles of doggy parenting.

Line 32: “Have you ever taken your dog to Cherry Park? They just landscaped the lawn and it’s now a doggy haven.”

Careful with how you frame such a question. She’ll be leery to disclose the places she frequents to a stranger. Write this question so as to advise her to check out a certain place instead of asking if she goes there a lot.

Line 33: “I just adopted a dog and am now going through the name process but am overwhelmed. There are like 3,842 quality names out there (I know I made a list). How did you decide on a name for your pup?”

Asking for advice is never a bad way to go. Just don’t make yourself look ignorant or lazy.

Line 34: “I just found out that dogs see in more frames per minute than humans. So compared to us, dogs see in slow-mo. Despite that my dog still can’t catch a tennis ball.”

A fact followed by a humorous anecdote is a solid 1-2 punch as far as online dating first messages are concerned.

Line 35: “Have you noticed the anti-bulldog stickers posted around Brooklyn lately?”

Bring up a contentious topic concerning a subject she’s interested in. The merit of breeds is just such a topic.

Line 36: “Did you know that petting a dog and staring into their eyes releases oxytocin?”

Sure you want to be the source of oxytocin generation but before you can get there you’ll have to woo her. The best way to do this is by first woofing her up with comments about her beloved pooch.

Line 37: “I love “dog breed name.” I hear they “dog breed fact.”

Show her dog’s breed some love by letting her know you appreciate her pooch. Throwing in a cool fact about her dog’s breed will make you seem like a knowledgeable man.

Line 38: “Let’s be honest. The only way this will work out is if our dogs are buddies. Sooo, doggie date?”

A recent study found that users that have a photo showcasing their furry companion have their odds of getting a woman’s phone number from 10% to 33%. There’s a reason dog is man’s best friend. There’s nothing wrong with using your pooch to score a first date. Especially not if Spot makes a friend during the process.

When She Talks About Skydiving In Her Bio

Online Dating First Message Examples #39: “So I see that you’re a badass. Can you teach me your ways?”

This line works when she has showcased her skills in any extreme sport. The line is perfect because it begins with flattery and ends with a request to meet up.

Line 40: “I randomly recently heard that the youngest person to skydive was 4 year old. That’s badass and all but I’m pretty sure his parents are now locked up.”

A mixture of fact and humor is never a bad call.

When She Showcases Her Boxing Skills

Line 41: “I’m not going to lie. I honestly just thought George Foreman was a glorified grill salesman.”

Introduction Message On Dating Site

Sure it’s a little silly, but sometimes silly works. Especially when the competition is settling for “Hey cutie” as an online dating first message.

Line 42: “I’m tempted to use a silly pickup line with you but I’m afraid you’ll beat me up. You kind of seem like a badass.”

Pickup lines are just about never a good idea, unless they’re unbelievably brilliant and your subsequent message acknowledges how stupid the pickup line was. So basically, don’t use them. Be genuine and complement her non-physical features instead.


When She’s Into Cats

Line 43: I don’t want to get nerdy on you or anything. But I just learned that a group of cats is called a clowder.”

Show her you care about her interests by talking about them. You’re also more likely to receive a response if you keep the conversation on a topic she likes.

Line 44: “So I’m currently team dog, but I’m considering switching sides. Think you can persuade me?”

Challenge her. Just make sure the challenge isn’t too difficult.

When She Talks About Netflix

Online Dating First Message Examples for Guys #45: “Favorite show on Netflix that isn’t The Office, go!”

Not everyone scuba dives or even is the lucky parent of a K9. But surely everyone has their favorite Netflix show. It might not be the most exhilarating conversation, but it’s one that everyone can have. Keep it relatable.

Line 46: “I just finished Big Mouth and am need of a new show. Any suggestions?”

She’ll be flattered when you ask her for her opinion. Soliciting her advice increases her self-worth is makes her feel girl. Well done.

When She’s Clearly Into Travel

Line 47: What’s the weirdest food you’ve ever eaten while on vacation?”

Nowadays there are two things everyone is into; food and travel. Combine the two to create a question and you’ll surely receive a response.

Line 48: “What’s the coolest thing you did during your time in “France”?”

You’ll be able to tell where she’s been because of her photos or she will have written about it in her bio. Once you know where she’s been simply ask her what she enjoyed most about the city/country.

Introduction Message For A First Timer In A Dating Site

Line 49: “Did you know that in Bora Bora putting a flower in your left ear indicates that you’re single?”

A lot of women have been to Bora Bora. Log onto Bumble and see for yourself. Any talk of their most prized vacation destination will likely result in a full blown conversation.

Line 50: “Where’s the coolest place you’ve been outside of the USA?”

The whole purpose of an online dating first message is to get her talking. What better way to encourage chatter than to ask her about something that excites her as much as travel?

Wrap-up: Online Dating First Message Examples for Guys

The purpose of displaying the above online dating first message examples is to give you an idea of what women will respond to. As you can see, women are most likely to get back to you if you ask them a question about something their passionate about while adding some humor to your initial message.

Crafting a clever online dating first message is just one of the many components you’ll need learn to reach your dating goals and ultimately find the RIGHT woman to settle down with. If perfectly fine if you still need a little guidance.

That’s where I come in. When you book a new client 1-on-1 Skype session with me, we’ll address any concerns you might have regarding online dating first messages, discuss your dating history and any other sticking points you may have, co-create an action plan, and see if my 3 month coaching program could be right for you!

Prepping to send your first message on dating app to that cute someone who’s caught your eye?

I know how it is – it’s exciting and scary. You’re eager to catch their eye and get the conversation started, but you’re afraid that what you write won’t be compelling enough.

Your heart beating wildly, all kinds of thoughts race through your mind: What if I screw this up? What if I write something so lame that they don’t reply? Dammit.

Well, let’s flip that: What if you write something so gosh darn awesome they can’t help but reply?

But we get it. Crafting that first online dating message is daunting. Because that opening message is so crucial to getting a reply, it has to be done right.

Depending on dating apps and dating sites you're using and what your bio mentions, the openers can vary. So, we have shared plenty of examples that you can simply copy and paste.

Best for Serious Relationships

eHarmony

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Rated 4.5/5 stars

Best for Normal Hookups

AdultFriendFinder

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Rated 4.5/5 stars

Best for Discreet Hookups

Ashley Madison

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Rated 4.5/5 stars

12 Online Dating Openers For First Message

First Message Strategy #1: Introduce Yourself

There’s a LOT to be said for introducing yourself in your first message, and yet so many people don’t do it.

Why not? Well, perhaps they just forget.

But here’s the thing: Introducing yourself is basic online dating etiquette and it’s exactly what you’d do in most other real-life social scenarios.

Just picture yourself at a networking event, for example. What’s the first thing you might say to someone you’ve met that night? Maybe you’ll open with a wry observation of something that happened that night, but the most likely option you’ll take is to introduce yourself.

First Message Examples to introduce yourself

“Hey! I’m Chloe :)”

It’s that simple and it’s safe and risk-free.

First Message Strategy #2: Introduce Yourself With a Twist

If a simple hello seems too safe and risk-free, you can be a little bit more adventurous should you wish.

I often like to open with a quick joke before transitioning to my introduction.

First Message Examples:

“Is it just me or *insert witty observation here* …

Ha. Hi! I’m Will.

Starting with a joke is a little bit more exciting and it helps to build rapport before going in with the introduction line.

If cracking a joke isn’t your forte (at least online) then you can try something a bit different. Like this:

Hola! I’m sad to say that’s the only Spanish I know :(.”

Ha. Hey, I’m Julia. How’s it going?

Whatever you decide to open with, following it with your intro is always a smart idea because it encourages them to do the same. All of a sudden, you’ve both introduced yourselves and a small connection has been made.

Moreover, introducing yourself shows you’ve got basic manners. It looks so much better than leading with something like this: “What’s up?

Introduction Message For A First Timer In A Dating Site

First Message Strategy #3: Use Their Name

Addressing them by their name in your first message shows that you’ve taken the care to actually read their online dating profile properly, and it shows that this is definitely not a generic message. Even though it’s such a small thing, it can help to build rapport and a feeling of warmth straight away.

Examples:

Hey Mike!

Then, you can work on introducing yourself. Like this:

Hey Mike! I’m Lydia.

First Message Strategy #4: Tell Them It’s Nice To Meet Them

Sometimes, you have to be a bit clever with how you write your message so that you get a response.

For example, you could plant a seed in their subconscious mind that’s designed to encourage them to respond.

First Message Examples:

“Hey Mike! I’m Lydia. Nice to meet you.”

By using that simple phrase – it’s nice to meet you – you’re assuming they’re going to reply. This assumption can be very powerful on a subconscious level as it’s saying to them that, yeah, it’s really nice to meet you, too.

First Message Strategy #5: Pick Up On Something On Their Profile

When you pick up on something that’s unique to their profile, you’re demonstrating that you’ve taken the time to read their profile properly and that you’re not just using the same copy-and-paste message you use on other people.

This is, of course, impossible to do if they haven’t written anything in their bio and have pretty boring pics. If that’s the case, well, my question is this: Why would you message them at all?

If I’m stuck for something to say in my opener to someone, I take a look at their bio and pick something out to comment on.

Admittedly, this kind of thing can require some mental gymnastics. For example, if they’ve written something like “Netflix, wine, and cheese,” you don’t have a lot to go off. But there’s something there at least and you just need to use your imagination.

First Message Examples:

Hey, I noticed you like Netflix too. Pleaseeeee tell me you were as sad as I was that Stranger Things ended!!

If haloumi isn’t in your top 3 cheeses we can’t be friends.

First Message Strategy #6: Kick Start a Conversation With a Question

One of the easiest ways to get a response from someone is to ask a question.

That said, your question has to be at least one of these things:

  • Compelling
  • Unusual
  • Interesting
  • Fun
  • Funny

First Message Examples:

“How was your weekend?” could get you a response. But it’s pretty lame and even if you did get a response, where is the conversation going to go? What you want to do is ask a question that will almost guarantee an interesting response that will kick start a convo.

There are a variety of interesting and fun open ended questions that you can ask, and we haven’t got the time to go into them here. But I always feel it’s a good idea to go with one that creates room for a bit of role-play.

Like this:

We’re the last two people on earth. There’s a knock at our door! What do we do?!

What your favorite movie that you can never stop watching?

What's your favorite band and why?

What you love to do in your spare time?

What's your favorite restaurant?

This will engage them, it will get them thinking and it will elicit a fun response that allows room for you both to create a mini-story.

First Message Strategy #7: Keep It Short and Sweet

It’s pretty wrenching when you craft a super long message that you’re really proud of and you know is interesting … but they don’t reply.

What gives?

It hurts more when people don’t reply to long messages, mainly because it’s taken you so much time and effort for zero rewards.

However, you should put yourself in the shoes of the other person. Imagine you’re in a bar and a cute someone walks up to you. During their ‘introduction,’ they talk for 10 minutes without letting you get a word in.

Wow. It’s just too much.

And it’s more or less the same with online dating. It’s best to keep it short (but not too short – 100 characters is a good rule of thumb) and sweet. Introduce yourself, pick up on something on their profile and maybe ask a question, too. But don’t overwhelm them.

First Message Strategy #8: Focus On Common Interests

Make sure you don’t fall into No-Man’s Land by mentioning things you don’t have in common.

So many guys and girls forget to establish a common ground. On dating sites and dating apps, profiles have a lot to information that can help you establish a common ground so make sure you look at other person's profile.

First Message Examples:

“Hey, wow, that’s so cool you went skydiving. I’ve never done it! What’s it like?”

While this might get them talking about themselves, it’s not really good for creating that initial spark that’s so important.

This is why it’s a MUCH smarter idea to – for now at least – bring up things you have in common, and which you can have an early laugh about.

First Message Strategy #9: Barely Talk About Yourself

Your opener should be focused on the other person, so try to keep any talk about you to a minimum. There’s no need to brag about your achievements in your opener or to bowl them over with a “hilarious” anecdote.

You could create a rapport by mentioning something that you both have in common, but always make sure to steer things back to them.

First Message Examples:

Haha I’m a Netflix addict too! What’s your all-time fav show?

If you focus too much on yourself in your very first online dating message, it’s going to make you look too self-obsessed straight away.

First Message Strategy #10: Tease Them

Teasing someone early on is a tad risky but if you pull it off just right, it can really work for you.

Examples of such online dating openers:

let’s say someone’s written that they’re a Taurus in their profile. I might then open with a message like this:

Dammit. I was going to say that you’re absolutely perfect but then I realized you’re a Taurus. I’m a Leo. Unfortunately, I can’t get with a Taurus.

Now, this type of message could backfire to the point where you don’t get a reply because – for some people – it’s got a negative theme. On the other hand, it’s a great way to tease someone straight away and elicit curiosity.

If they’re into your profile, they might be thinking “Heck, why can’t they get with a Taurus?”

And they’ll straight out ask you.

First Message Strategy #11: Don’t Go Heavy With The Compliments

While saying something like “Oh, nice hair! How’d you get it to stay looking like that??” is perfectly fine, something like “You’re honestly the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen,” is way too cringe and weird in your opening message.

First Message Strategy #12: Don’t Send a Follow Up Message

Lastly, once your opener has been signed, sealed, and delivered, it’s time to message other people.

Why? Because this will get you out of the mindset whereby you’re waiting for a reply from that one person.

And when you wait for a reply from one person, it’s very easy to get obsessed to the point where you send them a follow-up message when they don’t respond. Like this:

“Hey! I know you haven’t replied yet but just thought I’d give this one last shot because you do look super cool.”

The follow up is a massive no-no because it subconsciously makes them un-attracted to you. The best thing to do is to shoot a few other people a message so that you’re not fixated by one person.

Takeaway: Sometimes, it doesn’t matter how awesome your icebreaker is, they won’t get back to you. Maybe they just don't check the dating app, maybe they’re super busy or maybe they’re already super into someone else. But if you keep refining your starter message and use these online dating tips to score more dates.

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